Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
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