Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
