I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
