I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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