I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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