haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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