He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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