When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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