We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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