i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
