There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
