She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
