yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
