I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
