Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Randomize
