thus making me awesome and them whores
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
