Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize
