There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
a search helicopter?!
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize