i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
