The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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