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We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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