it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
