This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
