he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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