you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
