So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
