Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
