Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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