Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
