my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Randomize
