It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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