im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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