I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
