she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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