haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
