at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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