I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
