Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
