He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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