butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
