love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Randomize
