Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
