All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
