Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
my being single is dangerous.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
