I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
