Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
