therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
