I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
