marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
the condom got lost in my hair
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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