apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
